"Float On" - Modest Mouse

Yep, floatin' on to the next part of life.  Movin' on.  I've packed up almost my entire dorm room.  Yay!  I'll be so glad to get out of there.  Going home and hopefully landing a job and getting a car.  3 exams stand in the way of me enjoying a summer.  Well, actually 3 exams and 3 weeks of student teaching in a 6th grade class.  It will be a pleasant challenge.  Another "floating on" event is alumnae inductions tonight.  Oh boy... I expect lots of tears and nothing less.  I'll be saying, "Adios," to my Big sister and 6 others.
I'm so ready to move on; Gah! I can't wait!!

According to me, my second year of college is done.

Life is precious.

Cherish every moment you're given.  I know that sounds typical, and people may say it often.  But think about that statement.  Life can be taken away from you at any moment.  Last night at 8pm a friend of mine had a baby.  She was expecting a girl; they had everything set up and ready.  She went into labor early and had a baby boy.  His lungs and kidneys weren't fully developed, and he went to Heaven at 10pm the same night.  I saw a photo of that precious child and almost cried.  His parents and grandparents wanted him so badly.  2 hours was all that child was given on Earth.  I've been blessed with 2 decades.  I'm guilty of being a grumpy gills and a Debbie downer, but I wholeheartedly believe it's time for a change.  So often we sweat the small things in life.  I find myself mad at the simplest issues, instead of letting them go and moving on.  It's not an overnight change; it takes a conscious effort, and I can honestly say I'm getting better.

According to me, no one should take life for granted.

Hi Ho! Hi Ho! It's off to work I go!

Just kidding!  I love my job, and I do it well.  However, I get so bored sitting at the desk for two hours (sometimes four hours) at a time.  There are no residents stopping by, no drunk people, no problems, which is a good thing.  I'd like some excitement or something more to do.  I usually do my homework, but I have no homework to do.  So this is what I did...

And this...

 And this...

I have so much fun having mini photo shoots at work! :)

It's okay to be jealous of my awesome job at school.  I will miss this next year, to an extent.  I'll be the boss of people like me now. Oh yeah!  I get to come back later today and sit here some more... joy.  Tomorrow night I get to sit somewhere else.  Why do I end up with the late shifts?

According to me, money is worth boredom.

"Not looking back, not forgetting where I've been..." - Jason Aldean

But what a feeling chasing the sun, living my life like it shot from a gun, laughing a little bit more with every mile.  Oh what a freedom racing the wind, dying to know what's around the next bend, smiling as I watch the years roll by.  I'm learning how to take it day by day on my highway.

Those lyrics speak some truth.  I spend a second too much fretting the smaller things in life and not enjoying the drive.  I've made my mistakes and will make many more, but I'm done looking back.  Though I won't forget where I've been, I'm never going back.  I've learned my lessons.

Today was a not so good day at first.  The usual people problems and awkward situations, but once I left the area and started getting stuff done that I needed to, it got better.  I took many deep breaths of semi-fresh air and got on with my life.  I'm not one to repay bad slash stupid with more bad slash stupid, but I can.  This girl is real.  I'm standing up for myself nowadays.  I've got a list of things to do and a time frame to do it all; don't get in my way.  Now, I don't mean for that to sound negative; it's just a fact.  I know what I need to do to take care of myself, and I do not appreciate people trying to mess with me... not cool.  And if someone does try to pull one over on me and lie about it, oh, that's really bad news for them.  Two can play those games, sugadoll.  But anyways, so after the dipwads were taken care of, I went to class and taught a lesson.  However, there were a few peers who didn't want to do my lesson.  Tough poop!  It's my lesson and you need to do it.  I did yours just fine.  Give me some respect here people!  They get shocked when I fuss, but I have every right to.  I'm not always some nice, sweet, and quiet pushover.  Luckily, I survived that lesson even if it didn't turn out quite right.  So my next battle was to present my grammar card game.  Exterminate the Grammar Bugs!  Exciting, huh?  We wanted to present second, but turns out we had to draw numbers to find out when we presented.  We got fourth.  Not too shabby, but we had some good competition.  One group went to the campus printing services and had an actual game board -- very impresive and expensive.  I was still proud of us, and at least we got it over with today. That's one huge weight lifted off of my shoulders.  Now on to the next events -- ceremony practice and a "special meeting".  I've been waiting for this meeting for a while...

Oh, and an update on the printer: it worked this morning after being unplugged all night and a couple of tries this morning.  I do not understand that machine.

According to me, grab life by the horns and wrestle it until you just can't anymore.

My Printer

My printer is controlled by the Devil.  I swear every time I've needed to use it in the past few months it has not wanted to turn on right away.  I've only owned it for two years, too!  Talk about annoying!  It will almost turn on and then beep beep! it turns off.  It's one of the most aggravating noises, too.  I have waited over five minutes now for it to turn on so I can print out a letter to my Big.  It looks like that isn't happening anytime soon.  The Devil's toy is now turned off for the night.  Maybe tomorrow it'll have some mercy on my poor soul...
     Signed, one upset college student

According to me, technology is bound to fail at some point.

Happy Easter!

Jesus has risen and the Easter bunny has delivered his goodies!  What a glorious day-- candy and salvation!  Congratulations to all of you who participated in lent; you did it!  It's also the perfect weather for once.  I get to wear my yellow rose sun dress!  It has rained every Easter for the past few years but not this year!  I woke up this morning to a basket of peeps, reese's eggs, sweet tarts, chocolate eggs, and of course, a chocolate bunny. :)  I am one happy camper.  I've also had a productive morning because I've done all of my homework until I meet up with my partners later today to perfect our presentation.

Later that same Easter Sunday...

So I now have lovely pink shoulders from riding in the convertible with my Dad to go look at some cars.  No luck on the car hunting, yet.  I also have melted Reese's eggs.  However on a happier note, I have 2 more weeks of living on campus until I can go home for 3 months.  Praise God!  My partners and I had a lovely time working on our presentation; we're pretty much going to wing most of it, but that's okay.  I have faith in us, and we should do fine.  I'm still praying for an A.  I also teach a lesson in Kinesiology tomorrow.  I'm preparing myself to teach about the movement of atoms and molecules in solids, liquids, and gases... exciting, huh?  It's been a long day, weekend, semester, year, etc.  Next semester is looking better and better as the days go by.  This Easter chick is super tired!

According to me, Easter is one of my favorite holidays.  I am hardly ever upset, unlike on my birthday, Thanksgiving, or Christmas.  Odd...

May be surrounded by a million people, I still feel all alone." - Blake Shelton

I want to go home.

Home is where the heart is.

"Home is wherever I'm with you." - Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros

Though I may not be with my love all the time, I'm at home when I'm surrounded by those who love me.  There's just something good about being able to come home and be at peace.  Even if I have a ton of work to do, I can still relax and forget the mess in the world (to an extent). 

Today I was able to see my uncle, aunts, and cousins I haven't seen in months!  We met up at a nice park, rode some paddle boats, threw a football around, and shared many laughs.  It had to have been one of the best days I've had in a while.  At first I was hesitant to go to a park - sounds boring.  But when my family was all there, time flew because we were having so much fun.  My cousins made me promise to drive down and see them this summer.  I'm already planning that long 9 hour trip!  I really am blessed to have such great family even if I don't get to see them often.  Distance doesn't matter when it comes to love and family.  They're still there for you, love you and miss you even when we're separated for months at a time.  That statement stands true for boyfriends, too.  Although you both may be oceans apart, you're still connected and there for each other.  Distance (may) make the heart grow fonder...  I'm able to find peace by knowing that.

According to me, distance is good.

"If I could write a letter to me and send it back in time to myself..." - Brad Paisley

What would it say?  It would be one of the longest letters for sure.  I think it'd be more of a list than a letter.  I'd include so many things.  Here's some of it:

• Practice smiling more often
• Hold the door open for all people (unless they're creepers)
• Speak up, even if you may be wrong
• Don't stay mad at grandma because she's not going to live forever
• Just because a boy says he likes you does not mean you have to date him
• Have some confidence, sweetheart
• Keep up the good grades; they'll get you somewhere
• Don't just have good grades; they aren't everything
• Choose your friends wisely
• Peer pressure does exist and try not to fall for it, and when you do, don't be too harsh on yourself
• Take voice lesson because you have so much potential
• Don't give up the violin just because Mama took it
• Exercise!  Your heart will thank you.
• Grandpa is trying to teach you patience, of course you probably won't ever have a lot, but it's good to have some
• Observe your surroundings... you can learn a lot
• Don't be a pushover

One of the last things on the list would be to not stop loving even if your heart gets bruised or chipped.  I may not fully trust everyone, but that boundary is necessary.  Life is a learning experience.  I love learning, though I may complain about class assignments.  I like learning that I can apply to real life.  I'm not sure exactly why God put me here on Earth, but He has a reason.  I'm slowly but surely learning what it is...  I was placed here to love and be loved - that I know for sure.
Love -- small word that means a lot.  I have loved, do love, and will love just as my Father loves me eternally.  I truly am a sweet, caring human being.  I feel as if we all have our moments where we get agitated, aggravated, frustrated, and just fed up with life.  But are we really done?  Do we really want to leave Earth in anger?  Do you want an end?  The thought has crossed my mind at times; however, it's love that keeps me here... no lie.  I don't want to lose what I've worked at to get.  We all have flaws, but that's what makes us beautiful and worth loving.  Someone out there loves my mistakes, forgives my oops, and loves me for me.  Why would I take that from them?  That's not loving at all!

Hey little girl with your tangled hair, your tattered clothes,
You're fifteen and you're about to bloom just like a rose.
You’re wishing that you had designer jeans
Like the ones you see in magazines.
Now I know you’d give anything just to fit in,
But your worth ain't on a price tag; it comes from within.
Don’t you know you’re beautiful? -- Kellie Pickler

According to me, you're perfect in the eyes of God.

"When I'm alone in my room, sometimes I stare at the wall." - Rick Ross

What else is there to do when you've got a load on your heart and mind?  I just stare and think about everything.  Sometimes I get a headache from all the thoughts running through my mind.  I suppose there's nothing wrong with thinking, but I guess it's what you think about that matters.  I reflect many times a day on where I want to be in the next hour, day, week, 5 years.  I think about my family members who I rarely see or speak to.  I think about friends new and old.  I think about what's next on my To Do list.  I enjoy contemplating in general.  What would I do without music to help express my thoughts and feelings?  A good friend of mine and I used to always laugh about there's a song for everything.  I still believe that statement to be true.  It's a good feeling to just let your mind run free and just sing and rock to the music.  There's no need for words; the singers say it all.

"All that bullsh*t is for the birds; you ain't nothing but a vulchur.  Always hoping for the worst, waiting for me to...  You'll regret the day that I find another [one], yeah." - Chris Brown

Can I truly say bye-bye to it all?  This may sound cheesy, but I want to chuck up my deuces to everything.  When the going gets tough, the tough pull through, but don't the tough want to escape sometimes?  I need a break from life... A nice drive in a sunny countryside followed by sitting on the hood of the car enjoying the breeze sounds a-m-a-z-i-n-g right now.  Maybe that'll happen one day, but for now it's back to the stress of real life - studying, writing, reading, performing, etc., etc., etc.

According to me, music soothes a troubled soul.

"If you ever loved somebody, put your hands up" - Nelly

"It was only just a dream..." I wish.It's been an interesting and rather tough last few weeks to say the least.  The spring semester is ending soon, and the summer teaching will commence.  There's just a few things wrong.

1. I'm missing someone very important.
2. I don't know where I'm teaching.

Now, you may be wondering how those two relate.  Well, they don't.  Those are just the biggest issues at the moment.  Not to mention that I have group presentations to do, as well.  I must not fail to mention that group work is not my specialty.  I cannot wait until next August.

Back to the topic, though. #1 is a person that means the world to me.  He is the person that I would do just about anything for.  Even though I've only known him for a couple of years, we've clicked from the start.

He's gone abroad now, and life in America just isn't the same.  But enough of that sob story.

#2 is a pain in my bum.  My university is terribly slow in arranging teaching placements.  I have 2 weeks until I'm supposed to be at some school!  I keep telling myself not to freak out, but I really am.  The last I heard was that 40 people are waiting. FORTY! *Facepalm.*

Lord, please don't let me be stuck with middle school. Amen.

So while I wait for #1 and #2 to become a part of my life (again), I live each day to the fullest: smiling at everyone, listening to good music, saying my prayers every night (or when necessary), and trying to be the best I can be.  The trick is to not let the not so great things in life get you down, or keep you down.  I've almost mastered it; it's a work in progress.

According to me, patience is an excellent quality to have.

"Welcome to the good life." - Kanye West

"The wait is over, and after all the talk, all I can say is, 'You're welcome.'"  This song has been on my mind for the past few days.  Besides the references of drinking, gambling, and such, it's a good song.  Live a life you're proud of, a life of happiness and success.  "Haters gonna hate," is what my sisters say.  I have to admit that it's true.  A lot of people have been in and out of my life, and now I feel like saying toodles to everyone who is against me.  Who needs negativity?  I'm living a the life that was given to me.  You only live once on Earth; make good choices.  I used to be hesistent to have fun... always worried of what would happen... forget all of that now... go for it.  Jump into that cold pool water and wake up -- live.  I just have to look up at the stars and thank the good Lord for blessing me.  I've decided to break out of my little turtle shell.

"It's Friday, Friday! Gotta get down on Friday!  Everybody's looking forward to the weekend." - Rebecca Black

(One of the most annoying songs ever!  However, she is making a lot of money off of it, so I have to give her some credit.  Besides, the chorus is true for many people.)

According to me, you should live a life with no regrets.

"Oh, darling, don't you ever grow up." - T. Swift

So here I am blogging about my life.  I truly believe it could make a successful sitcom or lame ABC Family series.  It's not as dramatic as The Secret Life of the American Teenager, but sometimes it's close to it. 

Life as a young adult is interesting.  Living at college, working crazy shifts at the front desk, attempting to do homework, and still trying to get people to notice you.  A professor once told me, "It's not about what you know but rather who you know."  Well, I don't know many. Whoops!  Finding out who I am is the biggest dilemma; however, I'm finding out really quickly.  Needless to say I am also quite satisfied with my discoveries.  Greek life is a master at making you grow up.  My Alpha Sigma Tau sisters mean the world to me.

They sure do know how to brighten my day, even if I get aggravated sometimes.  There's just something special about knowing there is always someone there for me to talk to who understands 100%.  I've grown so much as a leader, scholar, and person since joining.  Amazing...

My little and I are the absolute perfect match.  Sisters for life!  She's one girl who will be in the wedding, if that day ever comes.  We've got a lot in common and enough differences to enjoy getting to know one another.  If you ever want to further develop your people skills, just go Greek!  I may sound like I'm advertising, but it is definitely the truth.  Some say you're just paying for your friends.  Well, if that's the case, I'm not paying enough!

The college life of a small town girl in the middle of nowhereville surrounded by cows and townies... sound boring?  Oh, you have no idea.

So according to me, I love my crazy, semi-melodramatic life.